Musings 14 September 2021

If only….

The two worst words put together in any language and my worst fear if I’m honest.

And do we try to save our children from the dreaded ‘if only’s of their life?

These past couple of weeks have been another right of passage- getting our, now no longer young, children off to college and university. And as parental duty calls at these time, comes all the imparting of wisdom only acquired through life experiences and living through decisions both good and bad.

Our protective, parental instincts scream at us to protect them at all cost; to save them from the pain of regret, to give them a seemingly smooth path ahead, dodging all the proverbial onslaughts that life throws at us.

And it’s not that I look to save them from the knowledge that comes with decisions. What absolutely slices me to the core is being on the outside looking in on their journey, knowing what they are capable of and their potential- the very thing they are shaky on and oh so vulnerable to ‘the easy way out’.

How do you say to them, “in 15 years you’ll be wishing you did X”, without sounding like you’re playing dictator to their future? And it’s not about letting them make the small mistakes that make them go ‘I won’t be doing that again,’ but surely will as inevitably happens with the turning of drinking age. But the decisions that impact career and their macro life journey.